(Find Part One here)
It took some time but I finally relented. I had nothing to lose. The email was written and sent.
He facebooked messaged me the same day and we connected on whatsapp on 21 November.
By this time I had regrouped and was actively going out and living large. I was pushing new boundaries in my own independence and seeking out experiences that would definitely have scared me in a former life. I wasn't really in the 'needy' stage anymore - I kinda felt like I had started getting my shit together.
Then I wrote this blogpost the day before my birthday. I will never forget this day as long as I live. It was brutal.
He texted me after reading my post, I knew he really GOT IT. Of course he did....he had been exactly in the space I found myself right that moment. We chatted that night - briefly - around our grief experiences.
Another week or so passed; we began chatting more frequently on whatsapp. Like every day. Slowly we became more acquainted with each others' lives and generally developed a friendship that felt comfortable and easy. He had (has) a wicked sense of humour and an approach to life that mirrors mine so closely that at times it is quite unnerving.
I remember standing in my neighbours' kitchen with a G&T in hand one evening when 'the text' arrived from him. The one that asked if I was free for coffee sometime that week.
Not the one that said 'the kids and I are off the beach, do you wanna join us?'
This one was clearly a solo event.
I involuntarily did a little chick-skip; Andrea raised an eyebrow and said 'you may be in trouble here girlfriend'. It was a funny moment .... and also a very scary one.
And so coffee was had. Two hours on Noordhoek beach on a balmy December morning.
Two relative strangers and yet a familiarity that took my breath away.
It was the beginning of an incredible friendship - this I knew with utter certainty.
The rest was too early to tell but interest was certainly piqued as he invited me to join him at an event in a couple of weeks time...and I accepted.
See Part Three here