Where to from here?
I feel slightly at a loss with my blog at the moment. Not quite sure how I transition from the intensity of the last few months (and posts) to random arb posts about my day to day living. All seems ridiculously trivial. What the hell is the point? I guess I am going to simply write because its a discipline I know is beneficial. I know that writing helps me embrace my shit that I cant vocalise any other way. I was lamenting to a friend recently that I cant cry. Well, not easily anyway. And when I do I immediately try to make it stop. Crying for me always seems thoroughly counter-productive and extremely self-serving. I don't like it. I would far rather take that pain and DO something. One of the few things that can usually help bring on the tears is when I sit down and let my hand slide across the page - unedited, perhaps wrecklessly but ultimately honestly. I am beginning to think I may need to reassess things - perhaps tone down the DOING and try get in touch with the FEEL...